"The evil deeds of the wicked ensnare them; the cords of their sins hold them fast." (verse 21)
Ensnare means 'to capture', 'to catch', 'to trap', to be ensnared is to be trapped. One bad thing usually leads to another, this is true in our everyday life from basic everyday inconveniences to sexually impure thoughts or actions.
The idea of two people, man and woman coming together and joining with God as one is something to be rejoiced, blessed and honored. It is what God's plan is. Sex and everything around it is to be thoroughly enjoyed... WITHIN that marriage.
This chapter is really talking about self control. Self control is a fruit of the spirit, one that can be very hard to have. We are not perfect and have sinned, almost all those times have been due to 'lack' of self control. We know something is wrong but 'it's just this once', 'it's not a big deal' or even worse... 'nobody will ever know'. This may sound below you and you may be saying... I would never do something like that... but we all do. Whether it's in eating, sleeping, fighting, in relationships... self control is a tough one.
God is teaching us to have self control when it comes to lust... be discerning when it comes to every situation and pray about everything first. The devil is a sneaky serpent and can attack from every angle.
"Self control is a declining commodity in America society". Taken from Woodrow Kroll's book on Proverbs.
Verse 15 says, "Drink water from your own cistern, running water from your own well". This means dont go looking for something else, don't let your heart be unprotected for even a moment... look what happened to David in the bible. All it takes is 1 lustful thought which leads to another... this all happens because we are lacking self control.
"I made a covenant with my eyes, not to look lustfully at a girl". (Job 31:1)
We need to be wise like that... when we say 'I do' that is a covenant being made between you as a couple AND God. Lust can become something more so quickly. The devil is constantly poking and nudging you to 'just have one more look, it won't hurt anyone', as long as i do not get physical and, touch I am allowed".
You were created by God to mirror his image... created for a beautiful marriage that truly lives out the gospel. You were created for each other, not just whoever when you feel like it. This is what is so wrong in today's culture. Lust to God is no different than 'the touch' Your mind is part of your physical body right? So it is therefore a physical sin.
Chapter 5 explains a lot of details about 'enjoying who you are with', i will not go into detail but have a look. God created this wonderful person for you... be each others everything and put God first in all you do. Stay true to your wedding vows and be faithful to God and your spouse! For it i written in the bible.